VibeJolt

“ This foreign born A- list singer is getting ready to release music and make a comeback next year. However, his label and team have been pressuring him all year to make it official with this wanna-be Barbie singer on their label. She's had multiple albums and none have reached the top ten, let alone #1. Currently she is an opening act for the biggest tour out there and still couldn’t get a big hit or higher on the charts. Their label has invested half the year's marketing budget just on her and still didn’t get the big hits, like her vampire counterpart.

The thinking goes that if our foreign born singer commits this time to be a couple and not just showing up to a couple of events, but really committing to the story and the show, they can have his big comeback and get her her first number one and bigger album next year and tour. He’s not into her for obvious reasons and he doesn’t want it but has agreed since he wants a career comeback and will need to promote new music and a new album set for March/April of next year. What better way than to make it about another singer on her way up on the same label? His team posted pics with Barbie to get gossip started and get a feel for interest. The narrative will be they hated the alliterate singer, and she hurt their angel and now they love Barbie and she saved their angel. Now he just has to get inspired to write fake songs about a girl he has zero in common with and isn’t into. The other singer and he had been best friends for years prior to dating publicly and had a lot in common and families were close. This will just be a PR and they have to fake it since there is not a strong bond to work from.

As for Barbie she doesn’t care. She would do PR with anyone to get big. She’s obsessed at this point and doesn’t understand why she’s not bigger. She thinks she is more talented and sexier and has a cooler edger image than the other female singers to whom she is compared.”

Just let Shawn have his discreet gay sex and not be in a bearding contract.

I don’t see why this necessary anymore

“My loft always smells like vagina now! When is John Mayer allowed back in?”

[quote]Now he just has to get inspired to write fake songs about a girl he has zero in common with and isn’t into.

The idea that Mendes writes his own songs may be one of the most ludicrous things CDAN has posted. Also the idea he has to be forced to beard is a joke. All his team would need to say is "it will get you attention" and he'd agree

R4 they want him to beard. And he does write his own songs. Lmao.

He's done. Pop music has gone in a direction that doesn't include him. And he isn't talented enough to make the pivot and become relevant again.

Sabrina has no "it" factor. Her music is more about following trends than creating them.

He needs to start filming gay porn before he ages out of that.

This queen was never a thing and will never be a thing, no matter how desperately his Canadian 'entertainment' people try.

Cabello is delusional. She has masculine features that gay men and women praise but she's never going to get over as a sex symbol to straight guys.

There is no "comeback"

He was a fad and his tween fans have moved on

r5 Can't read very well, can you? I said the idea he needs to be forced to beard - as in suggesting he doesn't want to do it. And aw, bless, you actually think he's a writer?

[quote] “My loft always smells like vagina now! When is John Mayer allowed back in?”

John Mayer looks like he has a smell you can't get rid of.

R7, here are a couple of images of what Shawn would look like doing porn:

Who the fuck is Sabrina Carpenter??

And the only future career prospect Shawn Mendes has is on OnlyFans.

Dude should beard with that German jazz jennings person who did that song with sam smith

He's been poorly managed and marketed. In pop you need to be constantly reinventing yourself and his music and image has just stayed the same since his debut.

R13 get a job. You have too much time on your hands.

R18 because he’s limited to that. Would anyone buy a hip hop Shawn Mendes album? No.

He’s basically living an out life now anyway. The bearding attempts being forced by his management are ridiculous at this point.

I don't know. I read this BI a bit different. To me it reads like he is doing the bearding for her, not she for him. Like he is a has-been who is now doing the supporting act for an up-and coming (whether that actually works or not). Especially the "half a year's budget" makes it sound like he is the tool to make it happen for her.

On a side note, it's hard to imagine them as a couple. She perpetuates the image of the stereotypical TikTok influencer of the fakest kind while he is sold as the most genuine song writer who is searching for the truest soul every minute. Not sure who would buy this combination as genuine.

Shawn should write some songs about his heartbreak after John Mayer dumped him for Andy Cohen.

R21 no, he isn’t. Having gay friends isn’t being out.

God, I would love to tear up his bussy.

Sabrina Carpenter is described as a “wanna-be Barbie singer.” How lame.

I believe Shawn is a pussy hound.

I’d agree with you, r18, if it weren’t for the case of Ed Sheeran who’s also basically stayed the same since he debuted but still remains popular.

I don’t particularly like Sheeran, but he seems to be a genuinely gifted songwriter and his voice is much more pleasant than homeboy’s nasal whine.

[quote] He's been poorly managed and marketed. In pop you need to be constantly reinventing yourself and his music and image has just stayed the same since his debut.

We are a marketing firm not magicians. We did our absolute best with the product we were given.

R29 this. He’s not a versatile singer and he isn’t a dancer. He’s literally a white guy with a guitar. He fits in that section. He isn’t a Timberlake or Bieber who can sing bubblegum songs or R&B songs and can dance their asses off. They also know how to code switch between white and black audiences aka put on a blaccent etc. , unlike Mendes.

He's so hot. He should do dance music or something. Stop trying to be a star, just be an artist, Shawn.

A dance album for someone who can’t dance

He should bump purses with David Archuleta.

Recent photo of Shawn with the boys:

And yet you can tell they refer to themselves as The Girls

Shawn leaving karate class in L.A. this week:

[quote]Shawn leaving karate class in L.A. this week:

Shawn always seems to be going somewhere, except in his career.

He seems to be scowling quite often recently

Can he be remade into a male Taylor Swift?

Taylor may be annoying, but she has the it factor. And the girl works hard. Shawn is blander than white bread, and lazy.

Perhaps he could become a carnie.

Wasn’t Sabrina Carpenter previously bearding for Joshua Bassett? Supposedly, he had dumped Olivia Rodrigo for her, and all her fans hated him, until he came out.

About half the LA waiters under 30 are more fuckable than Shawn.

There are so many vaguely similar pictures out there of him wandering around in a wifebeater. Paps must be only earning pennies from them at this point.

[quote]New photo:

Sad. He's still walking around pretending to be drinking coffee, but now he's doing it without Camila and her coffee cup by his side.

Coarser and more scraggly by the day.

r48 Depends how much Shawn's paying them to take them

If he wants to pretend these are pap pics, he needs to learn to not look directly at the camera

I just don't understand bearding up. This expired milk Twink deserves to just be what he is— a fruitcake!

Charlie Puth and Tyler Posey getting married also gives me the same vibes. Maybe they got vacuumed into Scientology or something like that. Seems to be some very homophobic PR in Hollywood, but I could be very wrong. Maybe they were just gay for pay, it wouldn't surprise me.

But honestly, all these high-priority B-listers are used up. They've got loose holes that could fit the Hoboken Water Tower inside of them. They did their time and hope they enjoy being fake straights!

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